Editor's Note: What would Friday be without OddBob? Ok....maybe it's best not to ponder that TOO much. And hey, it beats thinking for ourSELVES, right?!With the completion of the third season of Battlestar Galactica on the Sci-Fi network, there are all kinds of speculation about who is or is not a Cylon.
The Top 10 Signs Your Best Friend is a Cylon
10> You were willing to accept the fact that she was one of a set of triplets. But dodecaheptuplets is a bit hard to swallow.
Editor's note: And even HARDER to SAY!
9> You suggest getting juiced. You grab a few beers, he sticks his toe into an electrical outlet.
8> You notice that his deodorant smells just like WD-40.
7> He's so nice and so agreeable. I mean, all this "by your command" stuff.
6> Programming in C gets him horny, and not in a normal nerdboy kinda way; we're talkin' full on "evil alien robot overlord horny enough to strupp the entire universe up the black hole without lube" if you know what I mean.
5> After an unexpected half-hour long monologue about God and love, he cleans and defragments your hard drive with a sternly worded threat.
4> The girlfriend is well-lubricated in more ways than one.
3> Her dateless Friday night: vanilla candles, a personal massager, and a DVD of "2001".
2> She has pretty much everything in the house chromed because it "reminds her of dad".
and the Number 1 Sign Your Best Friend is a Cylon...
1> He has a disturbing tendency to open fire on every Dodge Viper he sees.
Editor's Note: Well now THAT's just good taste.
The Top 8 Signs That a "Chick Flick" Is in Trouble
8> Explosive chase scenes outnumber heroic cancer victims.
7> Focus is so soft you can't even tell what's going on.
6> The heroine's idea of getting even is serving dinner five minutes late.
5> The ingenue is played by Martina Navratilova.
4> Lifetime wants no part of the movie rights.
3> Well, the director had a... *ahem*... different concept of "chick flick."
2> Just not enough plot in "Thelma & Louise 2: Ride to the Bottom."
and the Number 1 Sign That a "Chick Flick" Is in Trouble...
1> Males 18-35 caught in test screening bear traps fail to gnaw off their limbs to escape.
Editor's Note: Or dweebs. Or ME!
Happy dweebweekend, dweebpals!