OddBob Kicks off the week
EDITOR'S NOTE: PERHAPS THIS IS CRUEL, BUT WE HAVE A FEW ODDBOB ITEMS, AND WHY NOT KICK OFF THIS FINE (?) MONDAY WITH THEM.
MAYBE THIS WILL BE THE WORST THING THAT HAPPENS TO US ALL WEEK!
The new Tom Cruise/Steven Spielberg version of the H.G. Welles classic "The War of the Worlds" is about to invade theaters worldwide.
As a public service, we will now point out how this new version differs from previous ones.
The Top 5 Changes in the New "War of the Worlds"
5> Super-governor Arnold Schwarzenegger single-handedly prevents the hordes of "illegal aliens" from crossing the California border.
4> Rampaging aliens turn out to be Scientologists on meth. EDITOR’S NOTE: BUT SCIENTOLOGISTS DON’T ALLOW MIND-ALTERING DRUGS, DO THEY? (SMIRK)
3> Original: President immediately declares state of emergency. New: President first finishes "My Pet Goat." EDITOR’S NOTE: TEE HEE.
2> Elaborate special effects make Tom Cruise seem taller than his co-stars.
and Number 1 Change in the New "War of the Worlds"...
1> Mass hysteria breaks out when the aliens shoot rays that leave buildings intact and humans unharmed but utterly destroy iPods.
The Top 10 Reasons Mars Decided to Attack Earth
10> We're sick and tired of you sending those stupid little robots! They messed up the sand works of some of our greatest artists!
9> Physically disputing rights to the "Mars Bars" brand is cheaper than lawyers.
8> To get some of them exotic *two*-breasted women!
7> It's obvious you humans have no idea how to take care of your planet. So we'll make sure it's no longer an issue.
6> The unfortunate misconception that Ray Walston was executed.
5> It was a slow Sunday afternoon, no games were on and the wife wanted the crater cleaned out. So, what the heck, we attacked Earth.
4> A Mars Rover apparently ran over somebody's really, really slow-moving pet.
3> They misinterpreted the cancellation of "Enterprise" as the dismantling of Earth's space defenses.
2> Because 9-year-old Charles Thomas of Riverside, California didn't eat his peas last night. That's right, Charles, it's because of YOU. EDITOR’S NOTE: LOL.
and the Number 1 Reason Mars Decided to Attack Earth...
1> They were insulted that after years of sending diplomatic missions, we finally responded with two envoy robots, but neither was equipped with the proper ambassadorial anal probe.
EDITOR’S NOTE: AND ODDBOB IN A DEEPER MOMENT----------
Politicians should read science fiction, not westerns and detective stories. -- Arthur C. Clarke
EDITOR'S NOTE: GIVING POLITICIANS CREDIT FOR THE ABILITY TO READ, OF COURSE......
MAYBE THIS WILL BE THE WORST THING THAT HAPPENS TO US ALL WEEK!
The new Tom Cruise/Steven Spielberg version of the H.G. Welles classic "The War of the Worlds" is about to invade theaters worldwide.
As a public service, we will now point out how this new version differs from previous ones.
The Top 5 Changes in the New "War of the Worlds"
5> Super-governor Arnold Schwarzenegger single-handedly prevents the hordes of "illegal aliens" from crossing the California border.
4> Rampaging aliens turn out to be Scientologists on meth. EDITOR’S NOTE: BUT SCIENTOLOGISTS DON’T ALLOW MIND-ALTERING DRUGS, DO THEY? (SMIRK)
3> Original: President immediately declares state of emergency. New: President first finishes "My Pet Goat." EDITOR’S NOTE: TEE HEE.
2> Elaborate special effects make Tom Cruise seem taller than his co-stars.
and Number 1 Change in the New "War of the Worlds"...
1> Mass hysteria breaks out when the aliens shoot rays that leave buildings intact and humans unharmed but utterly destroy iPods.
The Top 10 Reasons Mars Decided to Attack Earth
10> We're sick and tired of you sending those stupid little robots! They messed up the sand works of some of our greatest artists!
9> Physically disputing rights to the "Mars Bars" brand is cheaper than lawyers.
8> To get some of them exotic *two*-breasted women!
7> It's obvious you humans have no idea how to take care of your planet. So we'll make sure it's no longer an issue.
6> The unfortunate misconception that Ray Walston was executed.
5> It was a slow Sunday afternoon, no games were on and the wife wanted the crater cleaned out. So, what the heck, we attacked Earth.
4> A Mars Rover apparently ran over somebody's really, really slow-moving pet.
3> They misinterpreted the cancellation of "Enterprise" as the dismantling of Earth's space defenses.
2> Because 9-year-old Charles Thomas of Riverside, California didn't eat his peas last night. That's right, Charles, it's because of YOU. EDITOR’S NOTE: LOL.
and the Number 1 Reason Mars Decided to Attack Earth...
1> They were insulted that after years of sending diplomatic missions, we finally responded with two envoy robots, but neither was equipped with the proper ambassadorial anal probe.
EDITOR’S NOTE: AND ODDBOB IN A DEEPER MOMENT----------
Politicians should read science fiction, not westerns and detective stories. -- Arthur C. Clarke
EDITOR'S NOTE: GIVING POLITICIANS CREDIT FOR THE ABILITY TO READ, OF COURSE......
posted by QOTD (the Queen of the Dweebs) at 1:21 PM
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